GROWTH & REFLECTION

A SELF PORTRAIT PROJECT

October 2017
Blue Cone Studios Art Walk

"But now to my dismay, I hate foreplay. I say, I don’t want to feel this way but I feel his mood begin to decay.' 

"But now to my dismay, I hate foreplay.
I say, I don’t want to feel this way but I feel his mood begin to decay.' 

  So before I can hear him say “don’t expect me to not look the other way “ lets just give him his /way/ so we can make it another day.' 

 

So before I can hear him say “don’t expect me to not look the other way “ lets just give him his /way/ so we can make it another day.' 

' Even with this is in the past, I still feel the rash and backlash of all this anxiety as he compared me to society because of my unwanted sobriety. '

' Even with this is in the past, I still feel the rash and backlash of all this anxiety as he compared me to society because of my unwanted sobriety. '

SeattlePhotographer_SeattlePortrait_Photographer_MandeeRae_ConceptArtist_CreativeDirector (5).jpg
SeattlePhotographer_SeattlePortrait_Photographer_MandeeRae_ConceptArtist_CreativeDirector (6).jpg

Imagine grabbing a Pepsi bottle & shaking it up real fast and then letting the lid go. That's how I can best describe my year in 2016.
One chaotic bubble after the other until an uncontainable explosion occurred. That explosion was /my/ final ending to a toxic, unhealthy relationship that I'd lost myself into for over 5 years. Even now, it has taken me over a year to process things I allowed myself to go through & to understand the person I had turned into. 

 'Growth & Reflections' originally began with 1 idea & has slowly manifested itself into an ever-growing project. For many years, I was constantly pushing away and hiding from my thoughts. I was unknowingly in a mentally abusive relationship that was a major cause of my anxiety. He was someone who made me extremely uncomfortable with my body. He'd grab me for his enjoyment, not mine. He'd talk about our sex life loudly even when I'd ask him not to. There were so many times /I tried/ to explain the difference to him but the conversation always came down to it being my problem

The flowers represent emotional growth & love. 
The mirrors represent my reflection on myself in order to grow. 

MandeeRae_SeattlePhotographerReflections2.jpg
MandeeRae_SeattlePhotographerReflections5.jpg
SeattlePhotographer_SeattlePortrait_Photographer_MandeeRae_ConceptArtist_CreativeDirector (3).jpg
Strip down your emotions (2017). 

Strip down your emotions (2017). 

If you stop hiding from yourself, you'll begin to grow. (2017)

If you stop hiding from yourself, you'll begin to grow. (2017)

Even if you've fallen down, you're the one who can make yourself grow. (2017)

Even if you've fallen down, you're the one who can make yourself grow. (2017)